The Drywall Diaries #1

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As some of you already know, Jack and I are moving this summer. We’ve signed papers on a “carriage home” (sort of a cross between a townhome and a single-family home) that’ll be built by mid-June.


Unless Mother Nature has multiple hissy-fits like she did last winter. Then we’re talking September.

Why new construction? I elaborated on this very topic in my essay “No Mouse Poop Allowed” (available for download is my essay collection on Kindle), but suffice it to say that cleaning out a residence with 35 years of accumulated stuff cured me of “This Old House” fixer-upper fantasies for all time. Jack, thank heaven, doesn’t feel the need to prove his Bob Vila-hood either.

Here’s how the home-buying process has gone so far:

1) See a sign for a new development and decide to go visit, even though it’s probably not affordable and won’t come with the 2-car garage we covet.

2) Tour the model home and be blown away.

3) Mentally remove almost all the upgrades from the model home and still be pretty darned pleased.

4) Tour the home of someone who’s bought the exact floorplan we’re looking at (which the model homes don’t come in) and proceed to be blown away again. They got a lot of upgrades, apparently.

5) Go out to dinner and discuss the merits of various upgrades.

6) Run numbers. Discuss. Repeat multiple times.

7) Decide to take the plunge and contact our realtor.

8) Gulp, write a large check, and sign some papers to get the ball rolling.

9) Do a “lot walk.”

A lot walk? What’s that?

Glad you asked.

Basically, a “lot walk” means that you tromp over a patch of bare ground that will supposedly be your house one day, nodding wisely to camouflage your complete ignorance as the building foreman discusses things like retaining walls, grading angles, and drainage.

Lot walk

For our lot walk, we had the extra bonus of freezing wind and super-squelchy mud from the previous day’s downpour. The building foreman clearly found my inadequate footwear hilarious, as he gleefully told me “you’ll never get the mud off of those.” (I think he was right.)

At least our next appointment will be warm and dry – we’re going to the development office in a few weeks to start picking options. One thing we’re definitely getting? A garage-door opener (optional) for the 2-car garage – which is standard!


About the Author
Writer of whodunits, blog posts, humor essays, children's books, and medical copy. Either flexible or indecisive. Your choice. :)

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